Esteemed readers!
Hi,
I was sitting in my room after watching the movie “People You Meet on Vacation,” and it led me down a little reminiscing rabbit hole. I took the past semester off from school and travelled. I started my sabbatical on an impromptu whirlwind trip to New York City. Why NYC? Honestly, I don’t know. I think I was hoping to find some magic, and I did. Not in the way I thought, but I definitely found magic.
Two days before I was leaving, I called my mom and said to her matter-of-factly,
“Mumma, I am going to New York.”
“Okay….good idea, go,” she said.
The morning of my trip, my mum and I woke up bright and early to drop me to the nearest GO station so I could start my journey. I ended up booking a like 12 hour bus from Union Station to NYC (the cheapest option on such a short-time frame). I frantically began putting the last of my belongings in my bag and rushing to the car to get dropped off. We started driving, but I had this sinking feeling that we were too late in leaving, so as I expected we got to the GO station and the train had left.
“Shoot” I whispered under my breath.
“Okay, what do we do?” asked my mom.
I told her that the only other way I could make the bus was if I somehow got to Union Station in the next hour. I live around 45 minutes away from the city when there’s no traffic, and with traffic, it’s more like 1.25 hours. My mom was determined to get me to that bus, so we started the car up again, and Union Station was our next stop.
As we were driving, something felt different in the air. I turned from the passenger’s seat, and I looked at my mom with the utmost admiration. Something felt really different that day. I always loved my parents; I think we all do in varying ways, but I think people rarely talk about how that love transforms as you age. In that moment, specifically, a completely new part of my heart unlocked for my mom and I felt so much love for her. I looked at her, and she smiled, almost like maybe she knew what I was thinking. Sara Halai, that’s my mom. She’s kind of like the coolest person you’ll ever meet. A character that reminds me of her is Geet from Jab We Met, and I think the best word to describe her would be free-spirited. She’s taught me everything I know, and she keeps teaching me every day, but one of my favourite lessons she taught me is that nobody is a “bad person”.
I quickly turned my head to face the window again as I began to feel tears well up in my eyes. I lucked out on the mom lottery.
As I said bye to my mom and walked to the bus, I remember feeling my sweaty palms. Nervous, excited, scared and eager. It felt like the start of something new, a new chapter, a new beginning
Union Station never felt as big as it did that day. I remember getting lost on my way to the bus and finally finding my way and taking my seat. It was a long ride, I think 12 hours? I enjoyed it regardless. Hours passed, and eventually the sun set and darkness overtook my window. My eyes got heavier, and slowly I felt myself beginning to doze off in anticipation of the bright city lights.
“Final Stop! New York City!”
I woke up with a jolt and quickly gathered my things to leave the bus. As I stepped out of the bus, I felt it. I felt the magic that drew me here, and I knew in that moment that Allah brought me here for a reason. I looked up, and the lights of the glimmering city were blinding my eyes, and I realized I had to make my way to my Airbnb as soon as possible because it was getting late, and it was in New Jersey. Yep, that’s right. At 10pm at night, I had to venture from Midtown NYC to a small town in NJ. Cheapest Airbnb I could find on such short notice but I was excited. I made my way to the Port Authority Bus Terminal to hop on a bus. I met a really nice man there, dressed in a bright green outfit, who helped me find my way. Eventually, I got to my lodging and flug myslef into bed.
Goodnight.
“Beep, beep, beep,” my alarm clock shrilled.
Good-morning New York City.
The next three-ish days changed me, and I did a bunch of things I never thought I’d do. I sent a text I never thought I’d send. I sat on the steps of The Met. I journaled on a bench in Central Park. I saw a Broadway show, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child (one of my favourite parts of this trip). I had the best bagel of my life. I went to a jazz show. I walked, a lot, and much more.
But what did I learn? What can I take away from my experience there that I reflect on regularly?
Lesson Number 1: I learned that I am okay, and even if I’m not, I will be eventually.
I got thrown some curveballs this year, as we all normally experience every once in a while. For a little bit after, I remember feeling like someone took me, shrunk me to the size of a garlic clove, put me in a glass mason jar and shook the jar so hard that the garlic turned to a paste. But while I was a paste, I remember sitting in my pastyness and remembering that garlic paste is just as useful, if not more than, garlic sometimes. So I scooped myself up and started cooking.
The Holy Quran (94:5)
فَإِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا ٥
So, surely with hardship comes ease.
(94:6)
إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًۭا ٦
Surely with ˹that˺ hardship comes ˹more˺ ease.
Lesson Number 2: There is so much out there that your brain can’t even understand. So go outside and like just exist.
I think I started to realize that whatever you’re doing, you can do it anywhere in some way. And sometimes just venturing out into the unknown actually teaches you more about life, yourself and people, than most other self-help things.
Lesson Number 3: You’re never alone. Allah is always with you.
I think for a big portion of my life I didn’t know who I was. I let everyone else’s opinions become mine and I didn’t stop and think about what I thought. I used to think I was really alone and no one really understood me, because I took everything so personally and let one little comment ruin my day. Here’s how I changed that. I started to realize that everyone is just coming to the equation with THEIR conditioning. Other peoples actions (or lack of action) is simply just a reflection of them, not me. Once I realized that, I don’t think I really felt that loneliness again because I know I was understood and heard by As-Sami, The All-Hearing.
Lesson Number 4: Your. Perception. Is. Your. Reality.
Okay that’s a really big one and I want to do a whole separate blog about that so stay tuned.
Okay I think that’s it, thanks for reading friends.
Toodleloo,
Until next time,
Your friend, asma.
asma halai's blog 